Superfluous Hullabaloo
The world according to Feffie.Wednesday, October 30, 2002
Check This Out
You must check out this optical illusion. It will really screw with your head. I did not believe it at first, took some convincing, but it's for real. I found the link on Kat's Page. She has a real knack for finding screwy shit.
Sunday, October 27, 2002What is That White Stuff Falling From the Sky??
I went over to visit my old homies (former roommates) earlier this evening. One girl that they were hanging out with said that it might snow tomorrow (Wednesday) and I thought she was full of crap, really. As I was walking out the door to go back to my apartment, Laurel was walking up yelling, "It's snowing!" I walked out and looked up in the sky, and sure enough it was. "Dude. There's white stuff falling out of the sky." It was just very light, and it only lasted a few minutes, but it was cool while it lasted. I was catching the snowflakes on my tongue. I said, "Wait a minute... it's only October. Is it really supposed to snow in October?" and Laurel said, "Sometimes it snows in April!" Ick. And I thought it would be warm by my birthday (March 29). Guess it will be warm when my happy butt is on a plane to Florida! [Plane ticket = great birthday present idea :-) ] No one else seems to be as cold as I am. I wonder how long it takes for one's body to adapt?
Laurel proceeded to jump around joyously and inform everyone about the first snow fall. She told us how she was annoyed that it is so cold, but then she was happy when it started to snow. There was a "purpose for the cold weather." Apparently she really like snow. I thought it was cool too. I was kind of disappointed when it stopped, because it was amusing. If it snows a lot and I have to trudge through mounds of it, I am sure it will really annoy me though.
RJ Survey
1. LIVING ARRANGEMENT: Due to the fact that I am a poor student and can't afford to live anywhere else in this high-priced community, I live in a ghetto piece of trash on-campus apartment complex littered with broken beer bottles and trashy, inconsiderate people.
2. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? I am reading a book called The Celestine Prophecy that Nicole lent me. It's really interesting.
3. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Two birds perches on a tree, beaks open as if they are conversing, with the words, "Everyone's talking about the Florida International Festival; Daytona Beach"
4. FAVORITE CARD GAME? I don't play cards much anymore. Rummy I suppose?
5. FAVORITE MAGAZINE? Well, the only magazine I've been reading recently is the New Yorker. My mom subscribes to it, and she sends me the issues after she has read them. Kind of funny that I get the New Yorker via South Florida.
6. FAVORITE SMELL? Chris :-)
7. FAVORITE SOUND: When I play my oboe in tune.
8. WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD: That feeling right before throwing up.
9. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE UP? Do I really have to get out of bed this morning?
10. FAVORITE COLORS: Purple! I really like red, too.
11. HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE?: Depends on how long it takes to get off my fat ass and how far away the phone is. I don't just sit around counting the rings before I answer the phone.
12. FUTURE CHILD'S NAME?: Plenty of time to decide on that! I am still young and not even married or finished with school yet! Chris and I have agreed that we like the name Joseph. I don't think he'll agree to Sunflower, but he is OK with Jasmine.
13. WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT IN LIFE?: Love, family, true and loyal friends, and God.
14. FAVORITE FOODS?: sushi, chocolate, cheese
15. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA?: see # 14 (not that I don't like n\vanilla, but I have a real weakness for chocolate)
16. DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST?: Well, I don't really drive fast because I like to, more like because I am impatient. And I only drive fast when I'm not lost, otherwise I drive like an old lady.
17. DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL?: Yes. Mr. Chipmunk. He smells like my sweetie.
18. STORMS - COOL OR SCARY?: Lightning is cool to watch, as long as it's not destroying anything.
19. IF YOU COULD MEET ONE PERSON DEAD OR ALIVE WHO WOULD IT BE?: John Lennon
20. FAVORITE DRINK: Amaretto Sour has always been my favorite. I also like margaritas (frozen or on the rocks, depending on my mood), strawberry daiquiris, and good wine.
21. WHAT IS YOUR ZODIAC SIGN?: Aries, and it fits pretty well!
22. DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI?: Yes, I love veggies!!
23. IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED WHAT WOULD IT BE?: I'd like to be a professional oboist, and play mainly chamber music. I'd like to tour all around the world and party like a rock star.
24. IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR?: I have often thought of dying it purple (ideally a deep, royal bluish-purple), but i keep getting talked out of it.
25. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN LOVE?: Of course.
26. IS THE GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL?: My glass is completely empty. I haven't been able to drink since early July. :-(
27. FAVORITE MOVIE: Good Will Hunting
28. DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE RIGHT KEYS?: usually
29. WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? empty suitcases, empty CD cases, acrylic paints, who knows what else
30. FAVORITE NUMBER: 29
31.FAVORITE SPORT TO WATCH: I like hockey, it's very exciting. Football is also a lot of fun if I have beer to go with it.
32. SAY ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU: RJ is very talented and smart. I'd really like to see him use that talent and become a great choreographer or director. Also, he's a good friend and i hoep we always stay friends and never lose touch. Even if it's been a while since I last saw him, we always have a great time together.
33. IF YOU COULD BE ANY ANIMAL WHAT WOULD YOU BE?: a dolphin
34. WHEN IS YOUR BIRTHDAY?: March 29 (not giving the year, just assume that I am 21)
35. HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN MARRIED? huh? I'm not married.
36. NAME ONE PERSON WHO HAS CHANGED YOUR LIFE? Chris has changed my life. He has made me so happy, and inspired me so much. He helps me to believe in myself when I lose faith in myslef. I love him so much.
37. FAVORITE FLOWER? Sunflower
38. OF ALL THE PEOPLE YOU SENT THIS TO, WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Well, I didn't really *send* it to anyone, but I hope everyone who reads it will send it to me with their answers, or put it up on your site if you have one.
Thursday, October 24, 2002Not Friday, but Five Nevertheless
1. What is your favorite scary movie? Silence of the Lambs
2. What is your favorite Halloween treat? Snickers
3. Do you dress up for Halloween? If so, describe your best Halloween costume. Yes. I thought I was pretty clever last year when I dressed up as a pimp (silver tooth and all!) and JD was my ho. We even acted the part. Candice dressed as JD was a riot!
4. Do you enjoy going to haunted houses or other spooky events? Well, I like the Haunted Mansion at Disney World. :-)
5. Will you dress up for Halloween this year? I don't know. Right now, I don't really have any Halloween plans.
Wednesday, October 23, 2002Is the Orchestra Too Loud?
Kim sent me this, and I was hysterical. I am sure many of you can appreciate it as well.
As a result of Mr. Hunt's recent article titled "Please turn down the orchestra" a survey of orchestral players was undertaken. The object was to determine whether or not, in the opinion of the players, orchestra have become too loud. This question was asked: "Do you, as a professional orchestral musician think that orchestras have become too loud, and if so, how has this affected you personally?" Following , in score order, are some typical responses:
- Flutist: "Yes, most decidedly. In fact the situation has deteriorated to the point that I am actually looking forward to being demoted to 3rd flute and piccolo where I will be able to make myself heard, at least on the picc.."
- Oboist: "I think so. I have trouble keeping up as far as volume is concerned. I have finally resorted to two pieces of cedar shakes tied together to make a reed and the conductor still keeps asking for more."
- Clarinetist: "Perhaps. The conductor has asked me to stand up on all solos so that the audience will notice me. I am also using one of those new titanium reeds. The tone is a bit metallic, but it does cut through the mass of string sound. I suppose the strings could play softer. I don't know; they have never been asked to."
- Bassoonist: "I really don't know. I didn't show up for the last three concerts and nobody seemed to notice."
- Hornist: "He wants it louder - he should hire more horn players!"
- Trumpet player: "I think we should play louder and faster and put it up an octave."
- Trombonist: "I really don't care. Just wake me up when we get to the last movement. By the way, where is the party after the
concert?"- Tuba player: "I never thought about it. What I want to know is why I'm not allowed to wear my lederhosen at concerts. After all, I am principal of the section!"
- Percussionist: "What?"
- First violinist: "No, I don't think so. When the brass come in we don't have to worry about intonation in the fiddle section. I don't know what's going on in the seconds. There are times when I can't hear them at all."
- Second violinist: "Perhaps. Things have become a bit more complicated. I now use two bows, one for the soft spots and another for when the brass come in. I use soap on that one instead of resin."
- Violist: "Duh?"
- Cellist: "Well I guess so. At least we have had to play louder since the bassoons stopped showing up."
- Double bassist: "I don't know about the rest of the orchestra but all we can hear back here is that damn tuba. We all chipped in and bought that big guy a tuba with the bell aimed the other direction, but he won't use it If we allowed him to wear his lederhosen would he play softer?"
The Cheese Club is a Big Fat Lie!!
I love cheese. It's so tasty, and I love the way it melts in my mouth. I love the way it feels in my mouth. I love the sensations it creates in my mouth. There are so many different textures and tastes of cheeses, it's like an adventure to try them all. So, when I heard there is a Cheese Club here at Purchase, I was dying to experience it. Just a little something to make this place slightly less wretched. The Cheese Club meets Wednesday night at 10, and often I had thought about going, but for one reason or another had missed the opportunity. Earlier this evening Elena, one of my roommates, mentioned that she wanted to go to a Cheese Club meeting, and it reminded me of my desire to go. Turns out that at that moment, we were just a few short hours away from Cheese Club time, and neither one of us had anything so pressing to do that we could not take a break from the Cheese Club. Also, with both of us planning on going, we would certainly remember and not let the time slip through our fingers and suddenly realize that it is too late. So I was psyched. I even wrote an e-mail to Chris telling him of my anticipation.
At quarter to ten, I began to bundle up and prepare to go. Just as I was putting on my final layer of clothing, Elena knocked on my door to see if I was ready to go. We headed over to the giant sculpture where the cheese club meets, and saw no one there. In case of rain or cold, the Cheese Club meets inside in the Dining Hall. Fine, it's pretty cold out, not frigid, but I suppose they decided to meet inside. 46 degrees is probably not the ideal temperature for serving cheese. I've heard that cheese has its fullest flavor at room temperature, so that must be the reason. So we went into the Dining Hall, looked around, asked a few people, no sign of the Cheese Club. Bitterly dissappointed, we started to head back. With one last desperate gleam of hope, I said, "Well, maybe they are out by the sculpture now. We got there right on time, and they are probably running a little late. After all, this is Purchase, and nothing starts on time." We got to the sculpture an still no one there, and no cheese. I even examined the sculpture, and no cheese was hidden anywhere on it. I came to the conclusion that the so-called "Cheese Club" is just a myth. Some sick jerk is hiding behind a tree at the other end of the field (where the sculpture is) laughing his ass off. Probably taking pictures of any dork gullible enough to show up for a "Cheese Club" meeting. Nevertheless, Elena and I were sorely disappointed and had really been looking forward to trying fabulous new cheeses. For once, I actually take the initiative to go out and DO something, and it doesn't even exist!
Well, I am determined to have cheese. Elena gave up and went to the library (and frankly, I should be studying as well, but in all fairness, I did accomplish a lot today), but I am dragging myself to the gorcery store and getting some damn cheese. I am going to find some fabulous, exotic, delicious-looking cheese that I have never tried before, and I am going to cut it up in delicate little pieces and savor it slowly. Luckily, there is a grocery store not too far from here that has a great selection of cheese and is open 24 hours on weekdays! So, off I go. It's not the same, but I will pretend. When Elena gets back from the library (if I don't go hog-wild and eat it all!) she will either be pleasantly surprised and amused, or think I am just plain nuts.
Cars and Computers
This is great...
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "If GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $2500 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release stating: If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:
- For no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
- Every time they repainted the lines in the road, you would have to buy a new car.
- Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. You would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all
of the windows, shut off the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. For some reason you would simply accept this.- Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
- Apple would make a car that was powered by the sun, was reliable, five times as fast and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
- The oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "This Car Has Performed An Illegal Operation" warning light.
- The airbag system would ask "Are you sure?" before deploying.
- Occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
- Every time a new car was introduced car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again, because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
- You'd have to press the "Start" button to turn the engine off.
Monday, October 21, 2002Oscar the Grouch
That's who I feel like right now. It was against my better judgment to get out of bed this morning, but I forced myself to do it anyway. I lay in bed for so long that I didn't even have time to take a shower before class. I took a bath last night, so I wasn't dirty, but I lacked that refreshed awakened feeling that a morning shower gives me. Now that I am back from class (the music history class that I already took as an undergraduate and am now auditing), all I want to do is go back to bed. I have homework, practicing, and chores (i.e. laundry and grocery shopping) to do, but my bed is just calling my name. This cold weather is really getting on my nerves too. And it's only October. What will I do when it's really cold?
I made some coffee. Didn't have the energy to brew a pot of real coffee, so instant cappuccino works just fine. It's actually not bad. Probably doesn't contain any ingredients found in nature, but oh well. It's warm and tasty, and hopefully it will wake me up some. Maybe I will go take that shower.
This has to be one of the dullest, most pointless entries I have ever written. Oh well. I'm over it.
Sunday, October 20, 2002Cell Phone Issues
I LIVE 30 MILES AWAY FROM THE BIGGEST METROPOLIS IN THE WORLD AND I CAN'T GET A DAMN CELL PHONE SIGNAL!! THIS IS ABSOLUTELY RIDICULOUS!!
Adapting
I'm starting to like this whole "fall" thing. The leaves changing are really gorgeous. When it's sunny out, the cold weather is not so bad. I still really hate it when it rains here, though. It's gray and gloomy all day long. Today is gorgeous, though. Sunny, and not too cold (about 60 degrees, which is chilly, but tolerable). I am even looking forward to winter a little bit, since Laura has me all psyched up about snowboarding, which I am sure will be a blast!
Friday, October 18, 2002My Little Sis is the Bomb!!!
Well, of course, all of my little sisters are groovy! Smooches to Victoria, Holly, and Heather too! Right now, however, I am speaking specifically of my Lil Brat, Andrea. She went to the Aerosmith concert (in West Palm Beach) last night, and she thought to call her Biggie in the middle of the concert. :-) Isn't that the sweetest thing?? She knows how much I love Aerosmith, and would have loved to be there at the concert with her!! She had a great time at the concert, and they did the second-stage thing just like last year. Apparently they played a lot of the same songs that they did when they played Jones Beach, but of course the audience was a lot livelier since it is Fun Florida and not Dumb Old New York!
The Friday Five
New Stove!!!
I just came back from my lesson, and they are installing a new stove in my apartment!!! I called maintainance about the dial on the oven having no numbers on it, and I guess they couldn't find a new dial, so they are putting a whole new stove! Brand new, like the one that was in the other apartment! Digital temperature display, and still has the plastic wrap! Woohoo!! Luxury cooking in the ghetto!
If they have brand-new stoves just sitting around somewhere, I wonder why they haven't replaced all the ancient ones... But this is upside-down world!
Tuesday, October 15, 2002He Told Me to Quack!
Yesterday during orchestra rehearsal, I had an interesting request from the conductor: he asked me if I could quack. On purpose. We were rehearsing Prelude to an Afternoon of a Faun by Debussy, and towards the end of the piece there is an English horn solo that echos an oboe solo a few measures before. He wanted me to make it quack. Oboe players spend our whole lives trying not to quack, and now he wants me to quack on purpose. All righty then... if he wants me to quack, then quack I shall. QUACK!
Monday, October 14, 2002Is War Against Iraq the Answer?
Is war against Iraq the answer to the United States', the Middle East's, or the world's problems? Will murdering Middle Easterners and sacrificing American lives bring peace? Will our representatives give the President power to act against the will of many Americans? If you find yourself asking these questions and you haven't yet spoken up to question your representatives, get on the ball! If you haven't asked yourself these questions, brew yourself a big, strong cup of coffee and WAKE UP! Now is not the time to be apathetic; there is far too much going on the world. Get informed. Get involved. Do something, because it does matter and it does affect you.
Homework
Darn stupid homework thing is interfering with my blogging time. >:-0 The short version: moved last week. Had two days to complete the move. Very busy. New place is much roomier, but old and ghetto. Spent lots of time scrubbing the apartment. Would you believe I cleaned before I set up my computer??? Yeah, that's how dirty it was. New roommates are nice, still hang out with old roommates too (just don't want to live in one bedroom with all three of them). Had a very rough week overall. On the verge of nervous breakdown. Chris came to visit over the weekend, and made everything better. He truly is my angel. Saw "Sweet Home Alabama." Good movie. Matinee prices end at 2 PM here. PO'd about that. OK, back to homework.
Friday, October 11, 2002Flying South for the Winter
I've decided that it's time to fly south for the winter. I woke up this morning to temperature in the 40s. Yes, that's Fahrenheit. Then the realization hit me that this isn't just a cold snap that will last for a week. It's going to be consistently cold until March. I don't know if I can handle this. At least it's sunny today. Really, it's a gorgeous day aside from the cold. The last several days have been rainy and dreary. When it rains here, it is gloomy and gray all day. It does that stupid misting thing and drizzles all day rather than just really raining and getting it over with.
My apartment is about 90 degrees now. There's a thermostat on the wall, but I have discovered that it does absolutely nothing. The school has one central control for the heat, and it's been on full blast all month (even though the first couple of weeks were quite warm for the most part, averaging in the 70s and even creeping into the 80s a few times). I am trying to find the perfect balance of opening up the window to let just enough cold air in so that I neither freeze to death nor melt.
Well, I have lots more to say, about the move last week, and about Chris' visit over the weekend (he really is an angel!), but I have to get to quintet rehearsal, so I'll save that for later. I hope everyone is doing well, and that those of you in Florida are enjoying the weather.
Tuesday, October 08, 2002The Friday Five
1. If you could only choose 1 cd to ever listen to again, what would it be? Big Ones
2. If you could only choose 2 movies to watch ever again, what would they be? Anne of Green Gables and Good Will Hunting
3. If you could only choose 3 books to read ever again, what would they be? the Bible, the Hobbit, and Lord of the Rings
4. If you could only choose 4 things to eat or drink ever again, what would they be? Sushi, chocolate, wine, and water
5. If you could only choose 5 people to ever be/talk/associate/whatever with ever again, who would they be? Chris, Mom, Dad, Grandma, and Aunt Peg (I would say my brother, but he never talks to me anyway :-(
Friday, October 04, 2002Moving Out
Well, it's official. I'm moving. I got sick and tired of living in a one-room apartment with three other people, and I complained until they did something about it. The solution is far from perfect, but hopefully will be somewhat better. It's a march larger apartment in which four people share three bedrooms, two singles and a double. The downside is, it's in a dfferent complex that is really ghetto.
Anyway, I will write more later, I have to finish packing. I am so sick and it is the last thing I feel like doing.
New York Sucks!!!
All I want to do is go to a movie. Not that much to ask. However, I have called up and searched online all of the local movie theaters, and they want nine of my dollars to see a damn movie!!! Unreal! NO student discounts! Anywhere! RAAAARRRRR!!!!!
Thursday, October 03, 2002The Friday Five
The Friday Five is on shoes this week! Woo hoo, I love shoes!
1. What size shoe do you wear? 9 or 9 1/2
2. How many pairs of shoes do you own? I don't know, do you want me to go count them?? I don't have as many as I used to. A lot of my old ones are falling apart, and I need new ones, but I am too poor. :-( Please donate to the Buy Stephanie Shoes Foundation (BSSF) so that I won't have to go barefoot this winter (ew, winter, a dirty word). OK, I counted. 25 pairs. More than I thought, but that is counting everything, even the old grungy ones and the weird ones that I rarely wear.
3. What type of shoe do you prefer (boots, sneakers, pumps, etc.)? Sandals, definately, the most comfortable. I have two pairs of really cute sandals that my sweetie bought for me this summer. Unfortunately, I will probably only be able to wear them for a few more weeks! Waaaa, I miss Florida!
4. Describe your favorite pair of shoes. Why are they your favorite? I have to pick just one favorite?? Well, I really liked my "good girl shoes" (I think Emily was the one who coined that term), but unfortunately they were just falling apart too badly and I had to retire them this past summer. They were Mary Jane style shoes with a think chunk heel and a white flower-shaped design on the toe. I wore them all the time and they were great for dancing. I had them for a couple of years, and I had already had them re-soled, but the main part of the shoe was starting to come undone. I think the last time I wore them was on graduation. You may be able to see a picture of them here. Out of the ones I have now, hmmm, probably either my black sandals (adorable AND comfy!) or my red high heels.
5. What's the most you've spent on one pair of shoes? Hmmm, I usually don't spend a lot. I look for sales at nice shoe stores and I will even but at discount stores (i.e. Payless) if I find something that's nice and comfortable (I have gotten a few of my favotires at Payless!). There was one time I think I spent $70 for a really nice pair becuase they were so fabulous, and they were well-made so I knew they would last. It was right after Christmas, and I had gift money to spend! (10 minutes later) Oh wait, I just remembered about my Doc Marten sandals. I spent $110 on them, but it was definately worth it! They have been through everything.
Wow, this really put me in the mood to go shoe shopping! If only I had some money... Maybe I will take a trip to Payless and see if I can find a bargain!
Wednesday, October 02, 2002Party at JD's Place After the Concert!
I wish. Tonight's concert is going to be sad. My parents are not going to be able to come, and neither is Chris. In fact, only one person (one of my roommates) is going to be there to see me. My other roommates were planning on coming last week when the concert was supposed to happen, but now they are out of town. There will be no going to Mainstreet Grill or other favorite local spots after the concert (Guiseppe's!). I wonder if people here go out after concerts? There will be no party at JD's after tonight's concert, at least not one that I will be able to attend. It's sad.
Disgruntled...
...does not begin to describe how I feel! I have had more than I can take of living like this! I am crammed into a tiny room with three other people, lied to by the school. The bunk beds shake when anyone makes the slightest move. I haven't been able to sleep. I am tired, sick, and angry. I was told graduate housing, not a refugee camp. The neighbors are loud, rude, dirty, and inconsiderate. I am here to get a masters degree, not for summer camp. This is a load of crap, and I am not going to stand for it any longer. I tried to make an appointment to speak with the director of residential life, and a secretary told me that she would not speak with me!! Unreal! If I have to plant myself in these folks' offices until they hear me out, I am going to be heard! I am a student here, and even in upside-down world, I have a right to speak with the administration when I have a problem!
Speaking of disgruntled (and postal workers have NO RIGHT to be disgruntled considering the crappy service they provide), my books are now officially lost in the mail. My mother mailed them on August 27. She sent them media mail, and I am not sure what possessed her to do that, since media mail is slow and uninsured, and I needed them for class right away, and they were expensive books (when I bought them the first time I took the class - another whole issue in itself). Had I known she was going to do that, I would have just sent her the money to send them a better way, i.e. UPS. I don't trust the post office, and UPS provides insureance (up to $100) and tracking at no additional charge. I am sure UPS screws up too, but it seems to be the lesser of the evils. Anyway, aside from all that, over a month after they were mailed, my mom received a letter from the post office that they were missing (she had already called a couple of times asking about them, and was told they wer unable to track the package). They sent back the package the books were in, empty, with a form asking for a description of the contents. What in the world do they do with the mail that causes the contents of a package to come OUT of the package and get completely seperated??? Really, I should have had the books sent by a carrier pigeon on steroids.
